the new chapter

I become what I've not expect before.
Indeed it is good.
Something good is happening.
I'm happy. That's it.



And I hope, I will happy.

Keeping my blog's background as white, don't wanna change the new templates provided by blogspot!


Another month arrive, and I'm still wondering why.
If I have a goal, I'll die for it.
Till now, I'm always know what I don't want, but still not really know what really do I want?
A beautiful question mark plotted, a ___________ blank yet to be filled in.
But I believe soon, very soon, I'm gonna get my way.
Grab the steering wheel, and turn to the way I want.
Get the remote control, switch to the channel I want.


What do I want? What do I need?
and the answer now that only can be provided is UNKNOWN


However,
at least I figure out what do I do not want/do.

Woodstock by Matthews Southern Comfort

No border

One day, everybody woke up and find their way out of here.
Only me, and me only still couldn't find the way out.
Sometimes I feel that we are the rubbish that being thrown in a huge tunnel.
Indeed we are human being.
Everyone starts to think what to do, rather than just waiting the time of death.
Being angel or demon is not your own choice, perhaps it is fixed.
You are a robot that were set to be an angel or a demon.
However, sometimes or most of the time, you may change it.
Change is your right, your power.


After that, some people managed to get out from the dump.
He climbs; She cries; They run.
I'm not greedy, I'll walk.


In the end, people cry and laugh.
In the end, people woke up.
In the end, I'll wake up and walk out of this dump.
And I hope I won't miss this dump anymore and will walk in a best posture to a best place, for me.

The end is another beginning

I've tried.
I'm tired.

I knew I'll be good.
I just know.

I hope to be like somebody, the kind of people who know what they want.
I just don't want to runaway.
I'm not a coward, of course.
Maybe just like a sheep, lost in a big road.

I can choose, I know.
Well, I don't know what to choose.
Once I've made the decision, no matter what, I know I can get it.
My life is always lucky.
I knew.

Just like what wrote in the "Secret" book.
Actually I've experienced it.
I don't know how other people's thinking.
Perhaps they are many people just like me.
We are lost.

Some said if a person still don't know what he or she wants after 18, it is the failure of education.
Indeed, and it's my failure.
I've set the "short goal".
Last time I just want to enter university.
That time, my results in school are in the middle standard.
I'm always in the middle, neither the best or the worst, I mean results.
Hence, I'm very appreciate what I've got till now.
Now, the end of university's life almost come.
And I'm totally lost in the pathway.
I always know what I don't want, but don't know what I want actually.

The worst thing is time is forcing me to think.
Yes, think, think and always thinking.
Emmm, hope got a decision, as soon as possible.

I'm thinking of seek help from others.
Unfortunately, I think nobody can help even they wish to.

Challenge

Lie to me, You said, I'm good enough, nothing should be added. If added, burden exist.
Honest speaks. You said, I'm really a bad guy. I should change.


Indeed, change is the most challenging task now.


It's seems like playing hide and seek between 2 personalities inside me.
I want the whole picture, not just a piece of a jigsaw puzzle.


When?
When is the day that I can see the whole picture?


If the truth of angel is hypocrite
&
If the truth of demon is honesty

Would you like be my angel or my demon?

Short notes

1. Although still in CNY mood, other things should be given priorities instead of relaxing too much.
2. The end still far away from me, I still can chase what I want.
3. I'm still young, indeed. I believe I can fly, one day.
4. Yes, I'm better than yesterday.
5. Wake up in the morning is not so difficult, but after wake up doing something really meaningful is an option.
6. I fight, I don't want run away.
7. I'm not coward, I have to, I must BRAVE.
8. I know, what I don't know will be figure out soon.
9. I'm lost, but I know I will find my way.
10. I'll find my way, the real my way.